HELLO, DARK ANGEL
Sorry been absent with words of encouragement lately, but been struggling myself with my own… struggle. We are all part of this current ride, right? Not immune to inhumanity here. Haven't been able to wrap my head around by the fact we might be facing Yet Again past horrors. Unnamed ones we've only read on books in the West; on the East though, not only a different story but, something to mind about knowing we have been not only privileged but never–knowing if waking people up through writing is better than sit and wait, perhaps crying watching the world's conditions, for the inevitable consequences that awaited for us, haven't done nothing with Real Efforts, Awareness and Intentions, for that terrifying 2020 "Bad–News–Guys" announcement.
It was never my intention to Hurt. Rather, Quite The Opposite. Thought to myself if I can use Words instead of sit and try to make my way with the project on sustainability been working on for the past 3 years, but let anxiety slowly creep in, reading the news and perhaps Waiting for Guns, all the better. And of course, said to myself "they are going to hate you, are you sure?" "they are going to find ways to whip and hit you also with words, so, are you Absolutely Sure?" And am Deeply Sorry again guys, but the answer is Yes.
There are no words of comfort i can give to family and close ones to the people taking their own lives, but if not by Words, how other way was there? A Direct Way… Not through divergent thinking, or double–cross negotiation, manipulation, song lyrics… Really tried to put it into words and broke onto understandable–chunks so it was 'readable' for everyone with an open heart and mind, with particular own humor and sarcasm to at least make you smile and appreciate Life.
I understand the anger. The lashing comments. The "you–don't–belong–here" words everywhere. But that's not all of you.
Thank You So Much for all the Kind Understanding Words of Wisdom from all the rest of you. Really Appreciate it. :)
Been reading a lot on consequence about Shame.
Been perceiving Shameful Postures on entrepreneurship, being Temporarily Financially Unstable or any other forms of people working their way out of deeply conservative, old school out–dated working structures from fifty–ish–year–olds.
I address This Specifically, because we need to Talk About This.
Know My Particular circumstances don't apply to anyone else, but my particular Struggles Do Apply to talk about demanding constant perfectionism – Which is Impossible, because, you know – Human.
On my case, remember Struggling Constantly in order to Get Respect. Didn't Understand Why People Couldn't Respect You – If You Haven't Disrespected Them, YOU KNOW? And Then, That Struggle Went On and On at starting Work as Soon as I Could to live home ( sixteen–years–old ), yeah, all right – At the local start–up on the suburbs, man! Still!! Work is work, man! You Also Start Interacting (Read: Negotiating) with other Humans on an early age, solving problems and 'strategizing' to get what you want since an early age, too! So, This Constant Struggle from 50–year–Old's of communicating that Doing Things YOUR WAY is Safer for everybody – Is Bullshit. With Respect.
Ladies and Gentleman, Please. Re–Read (I Cannot Say This Enough) "On Erotism" and "On Human Race" AGAIN and tell me Your Way Of Thinking is becoming more Short–Sighted than Ours. Because we are Including the Third Missing Component on This Situation! Our Level of Awareness That We Will Be Dead is HIGHER THAN YOURS. That's why We Are Choosing To Enjoy The Ride EVEN WHEN IT'S ABOUT WORK. That's why We Are Becoming Experts on Creating New Work and Ways for it to be Paid… different than the way You Created the World to WORK ON – MONEY. That's why any attempt of new invention or conversion or trade or… whatever you guys Understand it, is being attacked as Dangerous… and Not Safe… and Un–Stability Ahead… And You guys can keep trying to Invent Ways to Distract US, but I think you know that that's no Longer Working.
Now – That Doesn't Mean – You Yourselves, Didn't Broke Your Backs to get what you Have Today. Nobody is Questioning your Smarts, Resiliency, Dedication and Responsibility (Shoulder–Burning even… ) to have the World at this State, and there have been Gains, yes, but The Loses Are WAY EXCEEDING the Gains.
So… Please, GUYS! Can I Ask You – ALL OF YOU, Those Who Don't Like Football, COULD YOU PLEASE BE OBSERVANT BESIDES ME LOOKING AND PREVENTING THIS GUYS USING THIS TIME ON BOTH COUNTRIES IMPLIED TO DO ANYTHING STUPID? SIGNED ANOTHER THING THAT COULD "PRIVATIZE" SOMETHING THAT IS A HUMAN RIGHT TO HAVE???!!!!
PLEASE GUYS, PLEASE! DON'T DO THIS. WE DON'T DESERVE TO SEE OUR PLANET DIE BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO PLAY GOLF ON THE LAST CHAPTER OF YOUR DAYS.
STOP COMMUNICATING ENTREPRENEURSHIP IS DANGEROUS!
You Have No Idea The Stress You Guys Have Us In… If you Were On Our Shoes, Perhaps You Would.
For ALL you Guys Struggling With Depression Right NOW… Here's This Link from our guys from Fizzle who Nailed it at speaking about the Struggles Every Entrepreneur Struggles With, and how being a Juggler in Life is part of the ride, feeling 'sort' of Comfortable with Uncertainty in order to get things Done! But Knowing That (like our Emotions) It's TEMPORARY.
That you can wake up the next day and Try Again
– You See?
Ash Ambirge Also Writes about Soul Sucking Jobs Beautifully and she wrote something about Experiencing Depression from your Job, perhaps. Look That Out Yourself, man! Yizus... You want everything like we like to say in Mexico ❝Todo quieres peladito y en la boca, chinga... !❞
(Just kidding, gorgeous! HERE it is ^_～)
That if am late on a payment is Only Temporary. I Have Two Hands and a Sane Mind and Can and Will Use It to KEEP WORKING. I am used to Hard Work.
Shit, am not Lazy! You Just Want to Think So because You Want To Control Me and how i Think. Hmmm... You Can't.
That's Something Ryan Reynolds Also Taught Us on DEADPOOL, man! Sorry, yes! An Out–Dated, frankly a bit lame Dude Can't and Won't Ever Fit A Millenial. No am Not Shittin You… if you guys can still See my Twitter Account (… because I CAN'T! haha! ^_^ ) you'll see I AM A FAN!
That's Something Girls like Sophia Amorouso Came To Teach Us! And at first us Millenials of course Glorified Her, and then, when things get big enough for her to ask for Honest Help on things she didn't know and Things Didn't Work Like Planned, then the same Fucking Media Takes All The Blame On Her… WHAT?! See, this is why WE LOVE HER, YOU IDIOTS!
You wanted the project to Succeed on the First Attempt of Competing Against Brands that had been doing So on a SCALE level for decades!!! And She Knew the Risks, And We All knew Some products Could Be Questionable in Quality directly on Point of Purchase…! Come on, girl, yeah, it's OKAY! But don't think it was FARE the Media Contrast.
This is gonna sound weird but sort of miss the Smart–Word-Gang forming on Twitter, you guys made me laugh even when i was at my lost–low or help me Ask further, that's Community! ^_^ and yeah okay, also the angry–mind–challenging–but–also–smart–and–fun nasty people in there, too.
(Agh! No need Twitter! You broke the code it doesn't matter can't even change my password anymore… Just Wanted To Say I Miss Twitter Community So Much, THAT'S ALL!) :(
… Yes, fucking crying, live me alone.
So, on my lowest of low–days try to keep affirmations on top of my mind, even when it's difficult, even braking in tears in the middle of anything, like writing or yoga… but find Important to let all that Shit Out. So, if i can offer some advise to someone out there is this – just Cry if You Need To.
Go to the bathroom, luck and cry your ass out. Who cares about mascara right now, gorgeous! Honestly… Oh! You have meetings… Waterproof–mascara these days, then! Really! Who Cares!? Just try not to Freak People Out like i almost did on the supermarket the other day… Hardly could't hold tears listening to a song but only a nice old–man saw me so, just grinned and told him "Missing Grandma…" and he smiled back! And surprisingly said with a calm and tender voice smiling "So nice of you to remember her!… She Hot?" Ye… turned both awkward–funny situation there… haha!
I Wish and Pray for you all to Smile at least Once today.
I also Wish Good Luck to all teams giving their best on the court in Russia right now – Good matches out there, XO! :)
But most of all, I WISH AND PRAY for Families on the border to be Re–United Again, Soon.
UPDATE: I read this weekend that, disturbingly as it sounds, they are beginning to administrate calming–drugs to the Children being kept on camps, to make them more "Compliant" (???).
(Heads–Up and Aware People, We Don't Have Any Other Choice)